Improve Without Stress

stress

What’s up ? This is THE stephane ANDRE !!! I watched an Olivier Roland’s video  and I learned some good stuff.

I think that’s already happened to you. Do you put so much pressure on yourself to reach a goal that you fail ? And that’s very frustrating when we do personal development. When we put too much pressure on ourselves, we have negative effects. The goal of personal development is to become a better version of ourselves by being happier throughout our lives.

There is a very instructive story between Buddha and one of his disciple. This disciple asks to Buddha this question : « When I meditate, sometimes I put to much pressure on myself and it doesn’t work, I’m too stressed. And sometimes when I don’t put this pressure on myself, I’m not focus enough and I’m almost sleeping. What should I do ? ». Here is Buddha’s answer : « To practice meditation, you have to be like a zither rope. So that the rope make the right note, it must be neither too tight nor too relaxed, it must be exactly in the right range. It’s the same for meditation, you have to be neither too tense nor too relaxed to meditate in the most efficient way ».

Middle

balance

It’s funny because it’s the same principle with the guided meditation of Headspace . In several guided meditations, at a certain point, the person leading the meditation says : « From now on, you can let your mind do what it wants ». This allows you to relax yourself , to decompress to better concentrate later. But be careful, as Buddha said, if you don’t put pressure on yourself at all, you fall into the opposite extreme of laziness, lack of attention, and etc.

The answer is balance. It’s not easy to find the balance, but it’s very exciting to explore and experiment with it. Because it’s part of this trip that makes us better people.

It’s up to you experiment between : I’m too relaxed and I’m too stress. Seek the moment you progress to reach your goals and also where you enjoy life. Whenever you find the perfect tension, you’ll produce the perfect note.

Subscribe to my newsletter and share this article if you think it can help someone you know. Thank you.

-Steph

P.S. If you’re in Miami and you like Caribbean food, go to my cousin’s bistro to eat Haitian food, click here.

How To Reduce Stress (Part 1)

stress

I watched an Olivier Roland’s video  and I learned good stuff.

I am doing a synthesis of the Dale Carnegie’s book “How to stop worrying and start living”  and other sources on internet for a blueprint to manages stress in 4 steps.

Stress is about change, it means adapting to the environment of a changing structure. Stress is a feeling triggered by the interpretation of an event. It’s a reaction related to the constraints and the pressure undergone in its environment. Stress can be interpreted as something positive, whether it’s considered a challenge or as something negative, if it’s considered a harmful event.

The truth is that stress is a mistake of reasoning in relation to the attitude or behavior we adopt. This is an answer that isn’t adequate. It’s an alert for mental dysfunction as the body gives us an alert for physical pain. Fortunately, people can learn to control stress in 4 steps : Take a step back and analyze what triggered the stress ; anticipate and visualize ; organize yourself and communicate and turn away or adapt and accept.

1st step – Take a step back and analyze

 

keep calm stress

 

It’s necessary to step back and analyze what triggered the stress. Because before trying to solve that, it’s important to know what caused it. By analyzing what caused the stress, we can avoid certain consequences.

To do that, here’s what you can do :

  • Make a list of sources of annoyance that you have in your family, friends, school, work, transportation, etc. Once you have found them, classify them from the most impacting to the least impacting. You can also do a 20/80 analysis, that means identify the 20% of the sources that bring you 80% of your stress.

  • Ask yourself these questions : « What is the problem ? What is the cause of this stress in these sources ? What are the most serious consequences that I suffer of my experience ? »

  • Understand the emotion that created in these moments. Then check if it’s a real fear or rather a theoretical concern that doesn’t have much to happen in your life.

If a situation is truly unavoidable, you need to prepare yourself to accept it. We must give up the impossible because it’s extremely stressful to have no way to change a situation. To avoid this, you need to anticipate situations that may lead you into an impasse. Once these situations identified, you must try to really avoid them or change the course of things from the start.

It’s impossible to keep control of all things in your life. It’s useless to set inaccessible goals.

2nd step – anticipate and visualize

 

anticipate visualize telescope

 

 

The best way to handle stress is to anticipate. Based on the list you made in the first step (source of stress), imagine solutions and possible answers. Ask yourself these questions : « Why did you agree to be in this situation ? ». If what you do make sense, it limits the stress.

Decide how you want to live a situation. An event that happens to you can have not effect on you until you choose words to qualify it. If you say that an event is happy, boring, sad or extraordinary, it can become so. By qualifying the event, you modify the perception that you have of this event.

The way you see the event determines your body’s reaction. So take a moment to think before judging and classyfying a situation as negative.

Take Olivier Roland’s example. When Olivier Roland began to meditate, his neighbor’s dog was barking. At first it disturbed Olivier to focus on his breathing, it was stressful and annoying. After a while, Olivier realized that it wasn’t the barking dog that was stressful, it was Olivier’s interpretation of the situation. From the moment that Olivier decided that the barking dog was something neutral or positive, he began to appreciate when the dog barks. It’s a sign of life.

Imagination can be used to help fight stress. Get in shape before a stressful event. You can create a positive state of mind when an event is negative. Think of something positive like music, a holiday, projects in progress. Visualize a happy moment, a happy memory.

This the end of Part 1. In the 2nd Part, I talk about organize yourself and communicate and turn away or adapt and accept.

Share this article if you think it can help someone you know. Thank you.

-Steph

Good Use Of Book Information

book

I watched an Olivier Roland’s video  and I learned good stuff.

I bought a lot of books to learn new skills but sincerely, there is little that I have put in place concretely in my life. I took notes, made summaries but it was alwys theoretical.

Here another way to take notes. It has nothing to do with taking the maximum information from the book but rather taking as much information as possible to use it effectively in our lives as quickly as possible.

That things be clear, I don’t talk about science fiction books but practical books that teach us to have a new skill.

A pratical book allows us to take action more effectively than if we hadn’t read the book.

Of course by reading we’ll take notes but we’ll not take notes like at school. We’ll highlight actions we can put in place today in our lives.

Study Case

study case

At this momet I’m reading a book about Tai-Chi. I’m learning to meditate and for years I have been pacticing martial arts so Tai-Chi is perfect for me. Each time that I see an action that I can use today in my life, I put the infomation in highlight. I put this information in uppercase, bold, underlined or in a different color. By this way I’ll read my notes later, this information will jump to my eyes.

We can take notes to have theoretical knowledge, there is no problem.

Once we’ll finish the book when we’ll read back our notes, we can immediately see actions we can use in our lives. The concepts is to choose actions that are the simplest and the fastest to set up in our lives.

Baby step

baby step

The best strategy to start is to take only one action. This action is the most interesting and the easiest to set up in your life.

The problem that we have to use book’s information, it’s that we are too ambitious in the first step. We want realize great things in the first step so we don’t have the experience yet.

To avoid falling into this trap and be disappointed, imagine that your evolution is like baby steps. Choose an interesting and easy action to set up in your life today. It’s today that your work on it and not tomorrow or after tomorrow. By this way, you can immdiately adjust this action to improve it step by step.

What is the most ambitious action you wanted to do right after reading a book ?

-Steph

P.S. Do you want free training program ? Click here 

Smartphone apps :

To track my calories, I use MyFitnessPal 

To track my training program, I use Jefit 

Sometimes We Are Struggling To Be Healthy

struggling to be healthy

I read a Nerd Fitness article  and there is good stuff.

Doing things we know we need to do may sometimes seem impossible. We know we can have a better lifestyle to « stay motivated » and « get focused ». And yet when we work on a long-term project, we have the impression of always starting from scratch.

We doubt : « What’s happening ? Why I can’t do it anymore ? »

  • I know I need to eat better

    But after cook healthy meals for one week, I don’t have the time to cook and I buy pre-prepared meals.

  • I know I need to train more often

    But after train for one week, I’m less motivated, I see no result and I’m demoralised.

  • I still have a good physique

    But I try to have an athletic body like the pros but it’s always frustrating.

I already tought about it and I think you too. Change this situation can be useless if we aren’t well prepared. It’s like a video game when you will fight a Boss with 50 % of your life without potions.

Boost your inventary

inventory video game

It’s real, I advise to everybody to prepare their meal of the day in advance (like my Instagram’s video) to have health meals. And I advise you to eat 1-3 time per week in a restaurant (see tips for eating at restaurant and staying healthy).

There is the perfect plan and the realistic plan. We like prepared perfect plans to reach our goals but in reality, it’s harder. An imperfect plan executed is better than a perfect plan poorly executed.

  • Potion

    You can go in a restaurant to eat a big plate of rice, protein and vegetables. It’s quickly prepared, it’s not expensive and you have healthy foods in your body.

  • Improve weapons

    Find a blender with a good motor to do fruits/vegetables shakes. It’s perfect for a snack at 16h (4pm).

  • Improve your armor

    Buy a rice cooker to save your time in evening.

These elements help you to reach more easily your daily calories goal. I have never plan my meals for all the year, I plan what I will eat each week (when I go to the supermarket) and each day, I do my best to eat as healthily as possible despite the unexpected. It’s this imperfect plan that I use and I see results ! If I had continued to follow my perfect plan, I think I would have given up because of my environment.

Now, when I see old friends they’re surprised to see how my physique changed better and there are some who jealous me (but there is less brawl than before, it’s cool).

In a video game, when you will fight against a new Boss, you will have the maximum of potions to have the maximum chance of winning. When you attack a new problem in your life, adjust your priorities to build a new habit or miss your attempt to be healthy.

Mercenary and strategy guide

mercenary

In a video game, you can have mercenaries to help you to fight the Boss and you can unlocked strategies can help you have the advantage.

You used strategy guides or tutarial video to help you to beat a difficult Boss. Some people say it’s « cheat » but it’s up to you to follow instructions and execute them properly for it to work.

In life, you can also have mercernaries and strategy guides. You can find tutorials like « How to do squat properly » or « How to create your workout plan » but often it’s our lack of knowledge or lack of confidence that keeps us from succeeding.

Have a great mercenary (personal trainer) to reach your goal who all times yelling, prodding, educating and helping you to have results. Just have somebody to help you for one session or for one week can do the difference between long term success and long term frustration.

That means you need to have a mercenary (personal trainer) forever ? No, but it’s good to have the opportunity for several months to learn from a great mercenary (personal trainer) to follow the patterns set out in a strategy guide to have confidence to attack the Boss without being assisted.

A victory is a victory

victory

When you try to fight the Boss, all that matter is that you have 1 % of life when the Boss has 0 %. This can be an ungly fight and even you used 10 potions, this victory is important to continue. It’s for this reason you buy potions and upgrade your armor. This is what make the difference between victory and throw your controller against the wall.

The life is the same and it’s important to organize priorities to have success :

  • Discuss with your family about the financial investment to have a better health (gym, mercenary)

  • Save money to by health product and have tools necessary to avoid to eat at restaurants everydays.

Organize your priorities to reach your fitness goals and others aspects of your life, right now. There are Bosses that you fight with 50 % of your life ?

  • Hard to meditate everydays ?

    Use calm.com  and follow the 2 minutes of meditation guide (strategy guide).

  • Hard to start yoga ?

    Subscibe to a yoga class for a month to learn movements. By this way, you will have more confident to do yoga at home (mercenary).

  • Hard to eat better ?

    Seek in Craiglist or another website that do the same thing and find a Chef to prepare meals for you at a reasonable price for a month (improve inventory)

  • Hard to walk more ?

    Buy a Fitbit and train you body to walk 10 000 step each day until you can do it without technological assistance (improve armor).

  • Hard to do squat and deadlift properly ?

    Hire a personal trainer to learn properly to do squat and deadlift. Contact this personal trainer one month later to check your technique (mercenary).

  • Hard to learn a new language ?

    Use iTalki.com  and speak with a native speaker and in exchange you learn to him/her your native language. (improve your group).

Yes, it’s possible. You will try several times and you will do several mistakes to improve yourself and it will be difficult. The most important is to know why you do all these things and not the others. It’s to improve your lifestyle and you’re the only person to do it.

What is the Boss you’re fighting and what mercenary, armor, potion, you use to build this new habit to beat it ?

-Steph

P.S. Do you want a free program training ? Click here 

Smartphone apps:

To track my training program, I use Jefit 

To track my calories, I use MyFitnessPal