Emotionally Manage Negative Reviews

emotionally, manage, negative reviews, excellent, good, average, poor, worst

What’s up ? This is THE stephane ANDRE !!! I watched an Olivier Roland’s video and I learned some good stuff.

When we have company, we read customer reviews to improve the products/services. But we have a way of thinking that can hinder the company’s evolution. Here is an example, for a product the are 10 positive reviews and 1 negative review. The problem is that the entrepreneurs will think 1000 times more about the negative review rather than 10 reviews positive.

Bad comment

emotionally, manage, negative reviews

To change this way of thinkging, it’s necessary to understand that this is part of human nature. We have been educated by evolution to focus more on negative things than positive things. And yes, our ancestors lived in an unstable environment during the vast majority of the existence of the human being. Here are some examples :

  1. Our ancestors were very attentive to the elements that were partially negative. They could be very happy, have a great day but they had to pay attention to the powerful animals that could, by surprise, kill them.
  2. Our ancestors had to pay attention to the disputes that had in the village because these disputes could deteriorate the village’s stability. This can result in creating friction that undermines trust in terms of collaboration for survival.
  3. Our ancestors were never satisfied with their situation and this motivated them to improve their lifestyle through science.

Solution

emotionally, manage, negative reviews, positive

As you’ve seen, this is a way of thinking that we have in human nature and there are some tips to avoid being obsessed with these negative reviews. I propose 3 solutions :

  • Ignore them. The more negative reviews you see, the more you’ll be desensitized to that. It’s not very complicated because if your company is working well, you have few negative reviews.
  • Delegate the management of reviews to a member in your company. This allows you to avoid being on the front line in the emotional impact to be less affected. It’s true, this solution have a problem. It creates distance between the entrepreneur and the customers feedbacks. It’s for this reason that it’s recommended to set up a procedure for the member who handles the reviews saying : « From now on, it’s you who manages the reviews. The thing I would like you to do is that you only transfer negative constructive reviews to me ». Negative constructive reviews are the criticisms where you see the urge to help.
  • Create an email address only for positive reviews. For example, you can name this email : « positivereviews@yourCompanyName.com » and tell to the person who manages the reviews that each time he/she receive a positive reviews, he/she send it to this email. You can also tell to this person to make a screenshot of a positive review from social media and send it to this email.

With this email address, you create the email of happiness. This will be useful for moments of demotivation and doubt. If, for example, there is an negative reviews that makes you feel bad and you think about it several hours later, you can log on this email, read positive reviews and realize that you’re doing a good job. It’s really a special feeling to know that you’re changing the lives of many people. It’s really fantastic and it allows you to relativize.

It’s possible to make a combination of the 3 solutions. It means, you force yourself to read the negative reviews to desensitize you ; you delelgate part of the process to manage the reviews ; you create a magical email as a psychological support.

These solutions allow you to put things in their place so that you don’t get overwhelmed by negative emotions.

It’s possible that you know of other methods to handle negative reviews, if it’s true, share your method with us in the comments section.

Subscribe to my newsletter and share this article if you think it can help someone you know. Thank you.

-Steph

P.S. If you’re in Miami and you like Caribbean food, go to my cousin’s bistro to eat Haitian food, click here.

Manage Your Lipids

lipids nut avocado fish oil seed

What’s up ? This is THE stephane ANDRE !!! I watched a Jamcore DZ’s video  and I learned some good stuff.

Lipids help with brain function and hormones production like testosterone. Lipids are also the element that is the most energetic : 1gr of lipid is 9kcal while 1gr of protein or carbohydrate is 4kcal.

Lipids create the fat of living beings, which is why we most often use the word « fat ». There is 4 fat’s type :

  • Harmful fat – These are transformed fatty acids like partially hydrogenated oils. We find them everywhere, that’s why it’s important to have an ingredients label on foods.

  • Bad fat – These are saturated fatty acids

  • Neutral fat – These are monounsaturated fatty acids and they’re very beneficial for health.

  • Good fat – These are polyunsaturated fatty acids that are very beneficial. There are 2 families, omega 3 and omega 6. If your body has too much omega 6, it creats health problems.

Type

Harmful fat

It’s fatty acids that are partially hydrogenated oils that are, for example, in Nutella, candy, cookie, fast food and all pastries. It’s advisable to eat them moderately otherwise they create health problems. And unfortunately the majority of people consume this type of fat too much.

Bad fat

It’s fatty acids that are, for example, in butter, beef, cheese, coconut oil and cold cuts. Overeating this type of fat increases the insulin resistance that can cause diabetes. It also decrease the ability of your body to use this type of fat as energy.

But be careful because not all foods that contain this type of fat are equal. Take the example of coconut oil. Coconut oil is full of lauric acid which has excellent antibacterial and digestive properties for the body. This coconut oil is very rich in MCT (Medium Chain Triglyceride) whick is convenient to use to be shreddedd because it helps the fat’s oxydation and keep your muscle mass.

Fatty acids that are in bad fat have an important role in the testosterone’s production, that why it’s recommended to consume it in average quantitiy.

Neutral fat

It’s fatty acids that are, for example, in olive oil, almond oil, macadamia nut, brazilian nut, avocado and oleic sunflower oil. It’s important to diferentiate between oleic sunflower oil and classic sunflower oil. Classic sunflower oil has a lot of omega 6 and this create a lot of inflammation and other health problems. On the other hand, oleic sunflower oil contains oleic acid. Oleic acid has properties that control cholesterol levels by lowering your bad cholesterol and boosting your good cholesterol. Oleic acid is also good for the memory.

Good fat

It’s essential fatty acids, which means these are fats aren’t produced by your body. That’s why they’re important to consume. A deficiency of these good fats will create health problems. There are 2 families : Omega 3 and Omega 6.

Omega 3 : The source of omega 3 are fatty fish like sardines, mackerel, anchovies, salmon and tuna. There are also plant sources such as flaxseed, chia seeds, brussels sprouts, walnuts. It’s recommended to consume the animal source because they’re richer in omega 3 than vegetable sources (unless your eat huge amount of grain).

Omega 6 : The source of omega 6 are, for example, classic sunflower oil or soybean. All these foods with too much omega 6 are too present in the supermarkets. Omega 6 creates a lot of inflammation problem in your body, while Omega 3 decrease inflammation.

Consumption

lipids nut avocado fish oil seed

According to scientists, there is a ratio for having a healthy body. This ratio is :

  • -4/1 so 4 = omega 6 and 1 = omega 3

  • Or 1/1 so 1 = omega 6 and 1 = omega 3

The majority of people consume 20/1 so 20 = omega 6 and 1 = omega 3. That’s why a lot of people have health problems.

Lipids consumption is related to body weight. For exemple, take a person who weighs 85kg and who is beginner/intermediate :

  • To gain mass, it’s 0.9gr to 1gr per kilo of bodyweigth so 0.9 x 85 = 76.5 and 1 x 85 = 85. Which means between 76.5 and 85gr of lipids per day.

  • To be shredded, it’s 0.5 to 0.8gr per kilo of bodyweight so 0.5 x 85 = 42.5 and 0.8 x 85 = 68. Which means between 42.5 and 68 of lipids per day.

Now, take a person who weighs 100kg and who is a pro :

  • To gain mass, it’s 1gr to 1.5gr per kilo of bodyweight so 0.9 x 100 = 100 and 1.2 x 100 = 120. Which means between 100 and 120gr of lipids per day.

  • To be shredded, it’s 0.9 to 1.5gr per kilo of bodyweight so 0.9 x 100 = 90 and 1.5 x 100 = 150. Which means between 90 ans 150gr of lipids per day. A pro can take 150gr of lipid because he decreases carbohydrates.

These amount of lipids are to be divided between 4-5 meals a day for ease of digestion.

To be shredded, it’s really important to consider MCT

You have to pay attention to MCT (Medium Chain Triglyceride) because it increase your thermogenesis. Thermogenesis is what turns calories into heat and increases your metabolism to burn more fat. MCT helps you to be shredded by keeping your muscles mass as much possible.

It’s recommended to take 2 teaspoons of MCT per day, otherwise you will poop everywhere.

Subscribe to my newsletter and share this article if you think it can help someone you know. Thank you.

-Steph

P.S. If you’re in Miami and you like Caribbean food, go to my cousin’s bistro to eat Haitian food, click here.

Manage Your Carbohydrate

carbohydrate source food

What’s up ? This is THE stephane ANDRE !!! I watched a Jamcore DZ’s video  and I learned some good stuff.

If you want to learn how to manage your protein, click here and for amino acids, click here.

Carbohydrates are the main source of energy for the body. It’s true that we can have energy with proteins and lipids but they provide less quantity of energy.

To put it simply, when you eat carbohyrates, they turn into glucose and then into glycogen. To better understand, I’ll take the example of a gasoline tank. Imagine that the tank is a muscle and that the gasoline is glycogen. Gasoline in the tank helps move the car and glycogen in the muscle helps move your body.

This glycogen is shared in many places in your body : 80% in your muscles, 14% in your liver and 6% in your blood.

Carbohydrate type

 

Most people know 2 types of carbohydrates, slow carbohydrates and simple carbohydrates. There is a 3rd type, it’s fibrous carbohydrate and unfortunately many people neglect them.

Slow carbohydrates :

  • Whole wheat bread / white bread (refined carbohydrate)

  • Whole wheat rice / white rice (refined carbohydrate)

  • Oatmeal

  • Cereals (muelsi is excellent because there are often lipids and carbohydrates that are added like nuts, raisins, etc. ).

  • Sweet potato / potato

  • Whole wheat pasta / white pasta (refined carbohydrate)

  • Kinoa

  • Couscous

Simple carbohydrates :

  • Fruit (fructose)

  • Honey

  • Dextrose

  • Maltodextrin

  • Lactose (it’s sugar in the milk)

  • Cluster dextrin (it’s perfect during your training session because it has a low glycemic index).

Fibrous carbohydrates (vitamin, fiber et minerals) :

  • Vegetables (aspargus, carrot, cauliflower, salad, etc)

Carbohydrate, insulin and insulin spike

insulin spike blood sugar

There is a special relationship between carbohydrates and insulin. When you eat carbohydrates, they turn into glucose, which is a type of sugar, and then glucose is turned into glycogen. Glucose is managed by insulin. Insulin is a hormone created by the pancreas. The insulin’s role is to manage the sugar’s level in the blood. This avoids having too much sugar in the blood (hyperglycemia) or not enough sugar in the blood (hypoglycemia).

The problem is that the majority of people eat any type of carbohydrate anyway and they may quickly get a lot of fat. It’s important to understand that each carbohydrate has a different gylcemic index and this glycemic index will cause different insulin spikes.

Glycemic index

A glycemic index indicates how quickly carbohydrates become glucose in the blood. It’s for this reason that it’s recommended to eat carbohydrate with a low glycemic index rather than those with a high glycemic index.

Carbohydrates with low glycemic index  :

  • Sweet potato

  • Oatmeal

  • Kinoa

  • Sugar free fruit juice

  • Whole wheat rice

  • Whole wheat bread

  • Whole wheat pasta

  • Fruits (apple, orange, cherry, pear, apricot)

  • Cluster dextrin (for your training session)

 

Carbohydrate with high glycemic index :

  • Potato

  • Couscous

  • Table sugar

  • White rice

  • White bread

  • White pasta

  • Cereal (Kellog, Nestle, etc.)

  • Dextrose

  • Sweet drink (soda)

  • Fruit (melon, watermelon)

Here is an exemple of low glycemic index carbohydrates to eat. For high glycemic carbohydrates, it’s recommended to eat them in moderation because if you eat them in large quantities, after several years, you have the risk to becoming diabetic or having other health problems.

Consumption

Always take into consideration your bodyweight and your training’s intensity. There 2 bad situations :

  1. Have a not very intense training and eat too much carbohydrates, which results in having too much fat in the body.

  2. Have intense training and eat a little carbohydrate, which results in being weak.

Take for example :

  • A man who weighs 85kg and is a beginner. In this case, it’s recommended to start with 3.5gr per kilo of bodyweight so 3.5 x 85 = 297.5gr of carbohydrates to eat a day.

  • A man who weighs 85kg and who is advanced or pro. In this case, it’s 5gr per kilo of bodyweight so 5 x 85 = 425gr of carbohydrates to eat a day. As an advanced person, the training sessions are really intense, that’s why you need this amount of energy.

  • A man who weighs 85kg and who wants to be shredded. Let things be clear, it’s being shredded and not losing weight. In this case is between 1.2 ans 2.5gr per kilo of bodyweight so it’s between 102 and 212.5gr of carbohydrates to eat per day.

The carbohydrates amount to eat is to be divided into 4-5 meals a day for ease of digestion. Each meal is balanced in carbohydrates, proteins and lipids.

To be shredded

shredded lean lose weight vs versus

Let things be clear, be shredded isn’t a weight loss. In this situation, leptin must be taken into consideration. Leptin is a hormone that regulates your appetite. When you start to lower your glucides, leptin will aslo decrease and you’ll be hungry. These feelings of hunger are created because of ghrelin. Ghrelin is a hormone called « hormone hunger » because it stimulates the appetite. Ghrelin also affects your insulin and testosterone.

This means that people who too quicly decrease their carbohydrates will fail because the lack of energy will be too brutal. The feeing of hunger will be too intense because the body has not had time to get used to the new diet. This is where nutrition is out of control.

Never reduce carbohydrate to 0. The people who do that, make a diet ketogenic and you have to master this type of diet. The professional bodybuilder is doing this diet for 4 weeks, but they can do that because of chemical aid (steroids) and they have a dietician. The problem is that those who aren’t professional athletes and who are on a ketogenic diet do that because someone told them it was good. That’s why in the gyms there are people who lose consciousness because they don’t have enough energy. You need 50 to 130 grams of carbohydrates, just for your brain, it’s not a simple diet to lose weight.

Subscribe to my newsletter and share this article if you think it can help someone you know. Thank you.

-Steph

P.S. If you’re in Miami and you like Caribbean food, go to my cousin’s bistro to eat Haitian food, click here.

Manage Your Amino Acids

amino acids

What’s up ? This is THE stephane ANDRE !!! I watched a Jamcore DZ’s video  and I learned some good stuff.

To put it simply, protein is an assembly of amino acids which means that you have to eat protein so that your body can have amino acids. There are a total 20 amino acids, 8 are essential and 12 nonessential. Be careful, nonessential amino acids are also needed. When you see an amino acid with the word « star », it means that it’s an important amino acid to be in shape.

What we call essential amino acids are those that our body doesn’t not produce. That’s why you have to look for them from an outside source. This outside source is the food you eat in the form of meat, egg, fish, dairy product, etc. And it’s possible that the outside source is whey protein powder in concentrate, isolate or hydrolyzate form.

Each amino acid has one or more important functions that’s why I’m only going to talk about important functions to be in shape.

amino acids table

Essential amino acids

Here are the 8 amino acids :

Lysine

This amino acid transports calcium to your body and reduces the tryglycerin’s rate.

Isoleucine, Leucine and Valine are BCAA (amino acids star)

These 3 amino acids have the function of giving energy, repair muscle tissue, anticatabolic, helps in congestion (pump) and helps burn fat.

Methionine

This amino acid is an antioxidant, helps in burning fat in the liver.

Threonine

This amino acid creates elastin and collagen, it’s for the skin. This is beneficial for slowing down old age.

Phenylananine

This amino acid increases alertness.

Tryptophane (amino acids star)

This amino acid reduces appetite and promotes sleep. It’s also a precursor of serotonin, that is to say gives you a good mood.

Nonessential amino acids

Here are the 12 amino acids :

Histidine

This amino acid helps recovery and growth.

Arginine (amino acids star)

This amino acid is the Viagra of amino acids. It’s also the precursor of nitric oxide which helps with congestion.

Glutamine (amino acids star)

This amino acid helps to be focus, to have more energy and helps with recovery.

Aspartic acid

This amino acid increases testosterone but is not definitive. There has been a lot of scientific studies concerning this amino acid but unfortunately, it has not been 100% proven that aspartic acid naturally increases testosterone. This is why it’s interesting to read the latest scientific studies on amino acids because we’ll discover new things.

Gutamic acid

This amino acid is a neurotransmitter and it’s also used as a fuel of the brain.

Cysteine

This amino acid a detoxifier for the liver, fat burner and antioxidant.

Ornithine (amino acids star)

This amino acid derived from arginine. It increases your growth hormone, increases your sleep and gives you more vitality.

Glycine

This amino acid increases your energy and helps the synthesis of creatine.

Proline

This amino acid protects your joint.

Serine

This amino acid increases your energy, your memory and focus.

Taurine

This amino acid increases your energy, focus and endurance.

Tyrosine

This amino acid is important for the body because it regulates your hormones which are dopamine, epinephrine and adrenaline.

Amino acid derivatives

These amino acids are not part of the list of essential and nonessential amino acids because they derive from these 2 lists.

L-Carnitine (star)

This amino acid derives from Methionine and Lysine. This increase your energy, helps burn fat in your liver and burns fat.

Citrulline Malate (amino acids star)

This amino acid derives from Arginine which allows you to produce more Arginine in your body, helps to create more nitric oxide, more vasodilatation, more congestion, more endurance and more recovery buffer of lactic acid.

Choline and Inositol

These amino acids derive from Methionine and Serine. This helps in burning fat in the liver, helps to focus and it’s a fat burner.

amino acids food source

amino acids food source bcaa

If you don’t read my article about protein, click here.

Subscribe to my newsletter and share this article if you think it can help someone you know. Thank you.

-Steph

P.S. If you’re in Miami and you like Caribbean food, go to my cousin’s bistro to eat Haitian food, click here.

Manage Your Internet Presence

internet

What’s up ? This is THE stephane ANDRE !!! I watched an Olivier Roland’s video  and I learned some good stuff.

As you have notices, there are many Youtuber who are successful. With this phenomenon, more and more people want to create their Youtube channel. I created my Youtube channel in 2015 and I wanted to make vlogs but I still don’t want to learn video editing (a 4-minutes video would take around 4 hours to edit). So for the moment, I prefer to make videos on Instagram and Snapchat with my smartphone, it’s faster.

Be careful

With this phenomenon of Youtuber, I see that there are more and more people who think that it’s useless to have a website or a blog. For these people to manage their presence on the internet, social media (Facebook, Youtube, Instagram, Snapchat, Twitter, LinkedIn, etc.) are sufficient. I have also seen companies using social media to promote their services/products and they still don’t’ have a website ?!?

It’s a big mistake to create a lot of content on a platform that doesn’t belong to you. What I mean is that it’s a good idea to create content on several different platforms, but you need to own your own website or blog.

Risks

risk

There are several risks that can ruin your presence on these social media. You can be excluded from these platforms and the consequence is that you can lose all your contacts in 1 day. If you go to an infopreneur’s event (people selling information products) and you ask to 100 people : «  Who has already had his/her Facebook Page, Facebook advertising account or YouTube channel closed ? », you’ll have 5-10% of the people who will answer « yes ». This is not a huge percentage but it shows that it happens regularly.

Algorithm change can drastically change the number of people you can reach on the platform. Facebook is extremely sensitive about it. 1-2 months ago, Facebook has made a major change in algorithm so that content posted on Facebook Page reach fewer people than before. And Facebook has increased the cost of advertisement because there are more competitions to appear in the stream of Facebook users.

On YouTube, the algorithm change is less radical but there are changes. Youtubers complain regularly about changes and the fact that subscribers can’t watch new videos because the algorithm decided that the subscriber wasn’t interested enough. There are also changes in monetization rules that are usually bad news.

Being owner

When you own your website or your blog, you’re at home. You can’t be excluded from your own website. It’s true that this is sensitive to search engine algorithm changes like Google, Bing, Yahoo or DuckDuckGo but these changes are much more stable over time than social media.

Learning the basics of SEO is more important and effective in the long run than learning to be very visible on social media. For example, the tips you learned in 2015 to be visible on Facebook no longer work today. Now, Facebook has changed so much that you have become a beginner again.

Content type

Personally, the content type I create is to teach things to my audience because I’m an infopreneur. Anyone like me who aims to teach things to their audience and not make money with advertisements is totally the last priority of YouTube. YouTube is basically an entertainment platform.

Most people when they come back from a long day prefer to watch a video that makes them laugh rather than a video that teach them something on YouTube. What makes YouTube live is the Youtubers who make entertainment. There are Youtubers who make entertainment who earn interesting sums with videos (with products placement) and advertisement. It’s with this business model that YouTube is paid.

Independent

infopreneur information internet website

As far as I’m concerned, I don’t expect anything from social media. Let me explain. Yes, I build my presence on internet with Instagram, Snapchat, Twitter, Facebook, YouTube to create content for my audience because they’re on these platforms. But I don’t expect anything special because there may be changes that make a platform can become less interesting for me.

I’m serene because I have my own blog. My blog is at the center of my ecosystem and I promote my blog on several social media. My blog is my home. With my blog, I have a higher conversion rate than on social media. The conversion rate is the percentage of people who subscribe to my newsletter. With my blog, I have a conversion rate of 5% while on social media, it’s difficult to reach 2%. In the long run, it make a huge difference.

When you create content on a platform that doesn’t belong you, you can’t change your interface. For example, if you have an event in London or New York, you can’t put a banner on the right column of the interface so that people can buy a place. On Facebook, YouTube, etc, you can’t do it. And we must add that these platform changes interface without warning you. They do large scale tests to see the impact it can have on users, but if the interface decreases your audience’s numbers, that’s not their problem. You’re just a number.

To build your presence on internet, it’s necessary to have a website or a blog to have the maximum control over what you do and use social media to promote your website/blog. Think about it, what is the most popular social media 5-10 years ago ? It’s still the same today ? ICQ, MSN Messenger, Vine, Friendster, MySpace, they were cool 10 years ago, but today, defunction, obsolete.

Subscribe to my newsletter and share this article if you think it can help someone you know. Thank you.

-Steph

P.S. If you’re in Miami and you like Caribbean food, go to my cousin’s bistro to eat Haitian food, click here .

Manage Your Protein

protein food

What’s up ? This is THE stephane ANDRE !!! I watched a Jamcore DZ’s video  and I learned some good stuff.

I write this article about nutrition because when I started to seriously lift weights to build muscles, I didn’t know what to eat. There was a lot of people around me with impressive bodies but their muscle weren’t visible. So the problem I had was that when I ate too much, I had a big belly with swollen skin because of water. And when I ate a little, I didn’t have the energy to train in the gym.

Speaking with a bodybuilder, he explained me the basics of nutrition to have an athlete’s body or bodybuilder’s body but he told me that I should always continue to learn new scientific studies to be up to date.

To build good quality muscle, you have to eat healthy foods. These healthy foods are in the form of protein carbohydrate and lipids. The reason why it’s necessary to eat protein is because muscle is protein. If you cut your arm in 2 parts and you analyze inside, you’ll see that the muscle is made of protein, which means that the muscle is meat.

Here are the main sources of protein :

  • Beef

  • Chicken

  • Egg

  • Fish

  • Dairy products

  • Soy

  • Lentil

The nutritional quality source of these foods depends on whether they’re organic or not.

Protein is amino acids. Human body is composed of 80% amino acids. Your muscles, your skin, your bones, your hair are composed of amino acids. Each amino acid has an important role in the body. There are several amino acids like BCAA, glutamine, arginine, etc. I will write an article about amino acids.

To build muscle in our body, we need BCAA, especially leucine. Leucine’s role is to stimulate the synthesis of the protein that is responsible for muscle growth.

Consumption

protein healthy food plate

There are variations in protein consumption because each is different, each has a different goal and each has a different level of training (beginner, intermediate and advanced). Advanced level people are people who do amateur or pro competitions. There is the bulking phase and cutting phase.

We will use an example with a person who weighs 85kg.

Bulking

To bulk, you consume 1.5 to 2.5 gr per kg of bodyweight. For a beginner, it will be 1.5gr of protein. So the weight (85kg) multiply after 1.5gr then 1.5 x 85 = 127.5 gr of protein per day. For an advanced, it will be 2.5gr of protein. So 2.5 x 85 = 212.5 gr of protein per day.

Cutting

To cut, you consume 2 to 2.7 gr per kg of bodyweight. We lightly increase proteins and lipids to compensate for the reduction of carbohydrates to avoid losing too much muscle mass. For a beginner, it will be 2gr of protein. So the weight (85kg) multiply after 2 gr then 2 x 85 = 170 gr of protein per day. For an advanced, it will be 2.7gr of protein. So 2.7 x 85 = 229.5gr of protein per day.

With these results, you’ll organize 3-5 meals a day with about 30-35 gr of protein per meal. But beware, these meals should be balanced against carbohydrate and lipids.

Subscribe to my newsletter and share this article if you think it can help someone you know. Thank you.

-Steph

P.S. If you’re in Miami and you like Caribbean food, go to my cousin’s bistro to eat Haitian food, click here.

How To Reduce Stress (Part 1)

stress

I watched an Olivier Roland’s video  and I learned good stuff.

I am doing a synthesis of the Dale Carnegie’s book “How to stop worrying and start living”  and other sources on internet for a blueprint to manages stress in 4 steps.

Stress is about change, it means adapting to the environment of a changing structure. Stress is a feeling triggered by the interpretation of an event. It’s a reaction related to the constraints and the pressure undergone in its environment. Stress can be interpreted as something positive, whether it’s considered a challenge or as something negative, if it’s considered a harmful event.

The truth is that stress is a mistake of reasoning in relation to the attitude or behavior we adopt. This is an answer that isn’t adequate. It’s an alert for mental dysfunction as the body gives us an alert for physical pain. Fortunately, people can learn to control stress in 4 steps : Take a step back and analyze what triggered the stress ; anticipate and visualize ; organize yourself and communicate and turn away or adapt and accept.

1st step – Take a step back and analyze

 

keep calm stress

 

It’s necessary to step back and analyze what triggered the stress. Because before trying to solve that, it’s important to know what caused it. By analyzing what caused the stress, we can avoid certain consequences.

To do that, here’s what you can do :

  • Make a list of sources of annoyance that you have in your family, friends, school, work, transportation, etc. Once you have found them, classify them from the most impacting to the least impacting. You can also do a 20/80 analysis, that means identify the 20% of the sources that bring you 80% of your stress.

  • Ask yourself these questions : « What is the problem ? What is the cause of this stress in these sources ? What are the most serious consequences that I suffer of my experience ? »

  • Understand the emotion that created in these moments. Then check if it’s a real fear or rather a theoretical concern that doesn’t have much to happen in your life.

If a situation is truly unavoidable, you need to prepare yourself to accept it. We must give up the impossible because it’s extremely stressful to have no way to change a situation. To avoid this, you need to anticipate situations that may lead you into an impasse. Once these situations identified, you must try to really avoid them or change the course of things from the start.

It’s impossible to keep control of all things in your life. It’s useless to set inaccessible goals.

2nd step – anticipate and visualize

 

anticipate visualize telescope

 

 

The best way to handle stress is to anticipate. Based on the list you made in the first step (source of stress), imagine solutions and possible answers. Ask yourself these questions : « Why did you agree to be in this situation ? ». If what you do make sense, it limits the stress.

Decide how you want to live a situation. An event that happens to you can have not effect on you until you choose words to qualify it. If you say that an event is happy, boring, sad or extraordinary, it can become so. By qualifying the event, you modify the perception that you have of this event.

The way you see the event determines your body’s reaction. So take a moment to think before judging and classyfying a situation as negative.

Take Olivier Roland’s example. When Olivier Roland began to meditate, his neighbor’s dog was barking. At first it disturbed Olivier to focus on his breathing, it was stressful and annoying. After a while, Olivier realized that it wasn’t the barking dog that was stressful, it was Olivier’s interpretation of the situation. From the moment that Olivier decided that the barking dog was something neutral or positive, he began to appreciate when the dog barks. It’s a sign of life.

Imagination can be used to help fight stress. Get in shape before a stressful event. You can create a positive state of mind when an event is negative. Think of something positive like music, a holiday, projects in progress. Visualize a happy moment, a happy memory.

This the end of Part 1. In the 2nd Part, I talk about organize yourself and communicate and turn away or adapt and accept.

Share this article if you think it can help someone you know. Thank you.

-Steph