How To Reduce Stress (Part 1)

stress

I watched an Olivier Roland’s video  and I learned good stuff.

I am doing a synthesis of the Dale Carnegie’s book “How to stop worrying and start living”  and other sources on internet for a blueprint to manages stress in 4 steps.

Stress is about change, it means adapting to the environment of a changing structure. Stress is a feeling triggered by the interpretation of an event. It’s a reaction related to the constraints and the pressure undergone in its environment. Stress can be interpreted as something positive, whether it’s considered a challenge or as something negative, if it’s considered a harmful event.

The truth is that stress is a mistake of reasoning in relation to the attitude or behavior we adopt. This is an answer that isn’t adequate. It’s an alert for mental dysfunction as the body gives us an alert for physical pain. Fortunately, people can learn to control stress in 4 steps : Take a step back and analyze what triggered the stress ; anticipate and visualize ; organize yourself and communicate and turn away or adapt and accept.

1st step – Take a step back and analyze

 

keep calm stress

 

It’s necessary to step back and analyze what triggered the stress. Because before trying to solve that, it’s important to know what caused it. By analyzing what caused the stress, we can avoid certain consequences.

To do that, here’s what you can do :

  • Make a list of sources of annoyance that you have in your family, friends, school, work, transportation, etc. Once you have found them, classify them from the most impacting to the least impacting. You can also do a 20/80 analysis, that means identify the 20% of the sources that bring you 80% of your stress.

  • Ask yourself these questions : « What is the problem ? What is the cause of this stress in these sources ? What are the most serious consequences that I suffer of my experience ? »

  • Understand the emotion that created in these moments. Then check if it’s a real fear or rather a theoretical concern that doesn’t have much to happen in your life.

If a situation is truly unavoidable, you need to prepare yourself to accept it. We must give up the impossible because it’s extremely stressful to have no way to change a situation. To avoid this, you need to anticipate situations that may lead you into an impasse. Once these situations identified, you must try to really avoid them or change the course of things from the start.

It’s impossible to keep control of all things in your life. It’s useless to set inaccessible goals.

2nd step – anticipate and visualize

 

anticipate visualize telescope

 

 

The best way to handle stress is to anticipate. Based on the list you made in the first step (source of stress), imagine solutions and possible answers. Ask yourself these questions : « Why did you agree to be in this situation ? ». If what you do make sense, it limits the stress.

Decide how you want to live a situation. An event that happens to you can have not effect on you until you choose words to qualify it. If you say that an event is happy, boring, sad or extraordinary, it can become so. By qualifying the event, you modify the perception that you have of this event.

The way you see the event determines your body’s reaction. So take a moment to think before judging and classyfying a situation as negative.

Take Olivier Roland’s example. When Olivier Roland began to meditate, his neighbor’s dog was barking. At first it disturbed Olivier to focus on his breathing, it was stressful and annoying. After a while, Olivier realized that it wasn’t the barking dog that was stressful, it was Olivier’s interpretation of the situation. From the moment that Olivier decided that the barking dog was something neutral or positive, he began to appreciate when the dog barks. It’s a sign of life.

Imagination can be used to help fight stress. Get in shape before a stressful event. You can create a positive state of mind when an event is negative. Think of something positive like music, a holiday, projects in progress. Visualize a happy moment, a happy memory.

This the end of Part 1. In the 2nd Part, I talk about organize yourself and communicate and turn away or adapt and accept.

Share this article if you think it can help someone you know. Thank you.

-Steph

The Important Things To Delegate In Your Company

delegate

I watched an Olivier Roland’s video  and I learned good stuff.

Here are the most important things to delegate in your company

Accountability

accoutant

I often meet entrepreneurs who do their own accounting and they say it’s a nightmare. Here are the 2 reasons why I advise them to stop :

  1. Accounting requires a lot of time.

  2. It’s extremely easy to make a mistake. Even certified public accountants make mistakes. The problem when there is an error in your accounting is that all the numbers are wrong. And when all the numbers are wrong, you tax return is false and when your tax return is false, you are in a long-term nightmare.

It’s possible to find a good accountant for around $1 200 a year when you start a company. It’s always better to pay that than to be in a financial nightmare for 5 years because of a mistake in your tax return.

Technique

it provider

What’s cool is that with WordPress and its free plugins and themes, it’s easy to install and manage a blog / website. There are also other platforms that allow you to do the same thing.

On the other hand, when there is a major problem that exceeds your skills, it can be negative for your company. For example,your blog / website no longer responds. If you don’t know how to do, you can spend 2-3 days trying to understand the problem and it’s been 2-3 days since your audience no longer has access to your blog / website.

At that moment, you need an IT provider. This is not a person you will hire as an employee but it’s a person to whom you can entrust all the technical tasks that you don’t knew how to do.

Yes, it will cost money but ask yourself this question : « Is it better to spend 2-3 says repairing your blog / website is down or pay a IT provider who repairs it in 1 hour ? ».

I advise you to find a IT provider quickly when you start making money with your company before having a major problem. Maybe someone around you knows a good IT provider or maybe you need to find one on Upwork. Test this IT provider with a small task to find out if her is competent or not.

Customer support

customer service provider

It’s something to delegate but not as fast as the technique. At the beginning, it’s important to do customer support yourself to be in direct contact with the audience to see the problems in services or products, etc. But that doesn’t mean that customer support is the best added value task that the company’s founder can do.

With customer support, you will quickly see that there are often the same questions that are asked. To eliminate much of the customer support is to make a FAQ. A FAQ is the list of questions most frequently asked with a reply.

For other questions that are a little more complex that are are common, you can do a procedure to explain to the people who take care of your customer service how to solve the problem. And you can ask them to inform you when a question is frequently asked to have a permanent feedback. This allow you to stay in touch with reality.

Maybe someone around you knows a good customer support provider or maybe you need to find one on Upwork. Test this customer service provider with a small task to find out if her is competent or not.

Social media

social media provider

Since you have a blog or a website, you have an audience. This audience sends you messages when you create content. This is the same principle as for customer support, it’s important at the beginning that you answer the messages yourself to discover your audience. You will know the fears and the hopes of your audience. It’s important that you learn how to communicate with your audience.

To find out what things to delegate, you need to be aware of seeing where you bring the most added value to your company as a founder, it’s about innovation, strategy and setting up processes. This allows you to work on your company and not work in your company.

It’s important to know the difference between working on your company and working in your company (being a slave to your company).

Solution

solution

I told you there was a way to find IT provider, customer service provider and social media provider on internet. The best known platform for finding freelancers or outsourcing is Upwork . You will find providers from several different countries. Always test a provider with a small task that doesn’t have a huge impact on your company to make the selection.

Share this article if you think it can help someone you know. Thank you.

-Steph

Fear Of Success (Part 2)

fear success

I watched an Oliver Roland’s video  and I learned good stuff

Fear of rejection is embedded in fear of success

rejection rejected stamp

The fear of rejection is even more insidious. Because to succeed, you have to do something that is not accepted by everyone. Typically what scares a lot of bloggers who start to succeed is to move from a model where everything is free to a model where a part is free and the advanced level is paying.

This is probably the most scary step for bloggers and people who create free content for a long time to build their audience. Asking money to the audience is not a bad thing.

Unconscious supporters of slavery

slavery

Sincerely ask yourself this question : « How would you call someone who demands that you work for him for free ? ». He is a supporter of slavery. All the people in your audience who will complain the first time you offer a paid service/product , they are supporters of slavery.

They aren’t conscious supporters of slavery because they didn’t take the time to think about the work you do . They didn’t realize that they’re unconscious supporters of slavery. They require you to work for them for free until the end of your days.

The good news is that when you start offering paid services/products, these people will disappear from your audience and that’s a good thing. It’s a natural selection and it will remain only in your audience people who recognize that all work deserves payment. It’s good to create free content but it’s good to live well too.

For example, many bloggers are afraid to put a popup for people to write their emails to receive newsletters. In fact, 1 week after installing the popup, you will realize that people don’t care.

Solution

solution

What needs to be done to overcame this fear ? The truth is that there is no miraculous solution. It’s like everything, you have to do it despite the fear. There is no way to get rid of fear before doing the thing that scares you. You need to do this thing while being afraid. You will realize that you are still alive and that the fear was overvalued. And all of a sudden, your fear disappears.

If by chance, you wait for the authorization of someone to be successful, know that I, Stephane, I give you my permission to be successful. Now, you allowed to be successful and I wish you have fun with it.

Share this article if you think it can help someone you know. Thank you.

-Steph

Fear Of Success (Part 1)

fear success

I watched an Oliver Roland’s video  and I learned good stuff

My Moment Of Clarity

morpheus matrix

In 2013 I realized that I was more afraid of success than being homeless. I went to another city for a job opportunity but it didn’t work. For several months, I spent my day with homeless people, illegals immigrants, good-for nothing people and drug addicts. All type of people that society puts aside and forgetting.

At first, I didn’t like this situation but over time I adapted and they accepted me. Now I think about it, I really learned to be a hustler with them. I mainly earned money with people from Africa (Nigeria, Ghana, Mali, Senegal, Congo, etc.) and people from Eastern Europe (Lithuania, Poland, Russia, etc). Often I was fighting on the street because people thought I was a nice little black boy. I train everyday at the gym. I ate 5 times a day. I had my laptop and I had 2 prepaid mobile phone.

But most of all, I felt free because I didn’t have a lot of bills to pay at the end of the month and I still had cash. There was not a days when my bank account was in the red and I promise you that it’s good.

Success in my team

team proud

In my team, there was a Congolese (I don’t say his name because he was a illegal immigrants). He had 4 children with 2 different women in another country and at the end of each month he asked me to have ideas to make more money. He was fed up with this situation, fed up with receiving welfare money that treated him like shit. He wanted to return to Congo and create a company. Now it’s cool, he has a good situation in Congo.

There was a Senegalese. He had a wife, a child and he worked at the airport. One day he lost his job at the airport and I don’t know all the details, but he lost everything. He couldn’t find work and his wife left him and kept the child. His wife didn’t want him to see his child, but she asked him for money. You see, a classic story.

This Senegalese told me that he needed more money because he was fed up with welfare that treated him as an illegal immigrant while he worked and paid his taxes like everyone else. He wanted more money to return to Senegal and start his own company. We worked well together and now he as a good situation in Senegal.

A few days after he left for Senegal, I watched a Gary Vaynerchuk’s video about building a legacy. Boom, I realized that I was more afraid of being rich that being poor because all my childhood I was in a middle classe environment or lower what had become my comfort zone. And my father often told me that I could never be rich.

Fear of success

fear

With my blog, I see that on internet, there are people who could have more success but they blocked. They’re stuck because of their state of mind because technically they are competent.

There are bloggers who have a good traffic and an email list that grew from day to day but as soon as they have to offer a paid service/product, they block.

This blockage is the fear of success. The fear of success is a fear of change. Definitely leaving the comfort zone for something else. If you succeed you will make more money but it will also change your life outside and the perception of yourself.

To be afraid is not something bad because it allows us to be attentive to everything, to have all our senses at their maximum capacity. You need to be attentive to everything when you’re in a unknown area.

Fear of failure is embedded in fear of success

fail michael jordan

But when you’re afraid of success, you are not only afraid of success. There are other fears that add to the fear of success. With the fear of success, you are also afraid of failure.

Think seriously about that. When you feel that you will succeed, it also means that you may fail. The worst time to fail is when you think you can succeed because it’s more painful. It more painful that doing something that is lost in advance.

It’s really comfortable to stay in your comfort zone, complain and do nothing.

This is the end of the 1st part. In 2nd part, I would speak about the fear of rejection which is also in the fear of success.

Share this article if you think it can help someone you know. Thank you.

-Steph

The Right Time To Offer A Paid Product

paid content

I watched an Oliver Roland’s video  and I learned good stuff.

It’s necessary to think of 2 things :

  • How to find the right time to offer a paid product while usually everything is free

  • How to handle fear and criticism about a paid product while usually everything is free

The right time

the right time

The right time varies depending on the sale mode and type of product. The approach to proposing a product is different when you do a webinar, a product launch  or a sales page.

The easiest way to sell a product is to make a sales page because you don’t need to worry about the minimum subscribers number to have in your mailing list.

What is extremely important to understand is that you need to stop being obsessed by the number of subscribers on your social media (Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat, Youtube, etc.) because it has not value. Let’s me explain, what is really important is the subscribers number of your mailing list (newsletters).

A lot of people have success on Youtube but unfortunately they need to stay on Youtube’s platform to keep their success. It’s really difficult to bring Youtube’s subscribers to another platform or another website. It’s even worse on Facebook because people are so used to the social media’s graphical user interface that they really have to give them an interesting reason to go elsewhere.

Survey

survey

Yes, with a survey you can attract all your social media’s subscribers to your own website. I advise you to do a survey when you reached 500 subscribers in one of your social media.

With a survey you can know :

Your audience reactvity

  • Your audience’s reactivity

  • What product wants your audience. This reduces the risk of creating an unsaleable product. The mistake entrepreneurs make is to create the product they want to do. For 1-2 years they work on it and when it’s ready, nobody wants to buy it because it doesn’t solve a problem of the audience.

When you reach 500 subscribers in one of your social media, you can say to your audience : « Hello, my friends, the community develops and it’s thanks to you. I would like to help you in a more efficient way that is why I propose you to answer a small survey where you’ll be able to tell me how I can help you to solve one of your problem ».

People who answer to this survey will show you the real reactivity of your audience. By exemple when you have 1000 subscribers, you have an average of 100-200 people responding to the survey.

The result of this survey will help you to create a product that will interest your audience.

Mailing list

Buid your mailing list (newsletters) is more important than having the maximum number of subscribers on your social media because they’re qualified potential customers. This what is make the difference between your subscribers who consume your content for entertainment and your subscribers who consume your content because it improves their lifestyle.

To build your mailing list (newsletters), offering an interesting free bonus to your audience is an effective way to collect qualified emails from people who are likely to buy your product. If you have no idea to make a bonus, you can make one by intuition and after adjust or change after conducting a survey.

eBook

By exemple if you have a Youtube channel or a Facebook Page about hamsters, by intuition you can imagine that the main problem of people is to ensure that their hamsters are well fed and long live. So you can write an eBook (digital book) like : « 5 tips for having a well-fed hamster and long live.

The concept is to offer something free in exchange for an email from someone of your audience. You really have to give something interesting so that people are : « Wow, it’s cool. I gave my email and I got it all ! ».

Criticism

criticism

I’ll be simple. All people who aren’t happy because you offer a paid product are supporters of slavery. Usually people aren’t aware of it. When you see a critic like : « It’s was great before, you offered a lot of free content and now you want to sell a product, it’s horrible ! ». What do you think ? Me I’m thinking of a person who wants me to work for him/her for free for life. And how do we name it ? A supporter of slavery.

Don’t be afraid ! You continue to give free content to your audience and in the same time your offer paid content. You don’t blackmail with your audience, your propose and people make their decision.

By having paid product that filter out people who recognize that your work deserves salary and people who are unconscious supporters of slavery.

Don’t worry, critics hurt at the beginnings but then it goes better and you gonna laugh at it.

-Steph

P.S. Smartphone apps :

To track my calories, I use MyFitnessPal 

To track my workout program, I use Jefit 

When you start, be at 100 %

start begin

I read a Nerd Fitness article and there is good stuff.

It was when the last time you were at 100 % to change your life ?

If you’re like me, it had to be hard. We’re afraid of being at 100 % and not succeeding. We want a plan B. We’re afraid to fail in front of our parents and friends.

Instead of being at 100 %, we will be at 50 % by this way, if we fail, we can say : « this system doesn’t work » or « I didn’t really try » or « I already knew it wasn’t going to work ».

Let’s listen to this Charles Bukowski’s poem :

It’s true, this poem doesn’t concern physical transformation but it is applicable .

We prefer to be at 50 % because if we’re at 100 % and we fail, what is left ? If we’re at 100 % and we fail, we will say to ourselves we’re failures, we aren’t good enough.

In reality, be at 100 % and fail is the best thing that could happen. When we used the maximum of our efforts and we fail, we improve our level for the next time. And especially, we don’t have regret. My mother was still talking to me about her regrets, again, 2 days ago. Regrets is poison.

Talk to people who are older than you and you will see their regret’s list is huge.

  • When we’re at 100 % and we fail, we make the first step to a true improvement.

  • When we’re at 50 % and we fail, we have regrets.

If you want improve your physique, be at 100 %. Give the maximum of your efforts, each day and see what you able to do. It’s not only for few days or weeks, it’s for all your life. You improve your body for all your life, not just to show off on the beach in summer.

Remember, if you try, be at 100 %:

« It could mean derision. It could mean mockery–isolation. Isolation is the gift. All the others are a test of your endurance, of how much you really want to do it ».

« And, you’ll do it, despite rejection and the worst odds. And it will be better than anything else you can imagine. If you’re going to try, go all the way. There is no other feeling like that. You will be alone with the gods, and the nights will flame with fire. You will ride life straight to perfect laughter. It’s the only good fight there is ».

Or like say Yoda in Star Wars : « Do or do not, there is no try ».

100 %

100%

We have one life on this planet and we can’t get what we want by being at 50 % because we’re afraid of failure or rejection or worst, fear of success. It’s the to get out of your comfort zone and be comfortable with being uncomfortable.

No self-sabotage, use the maximum of your efforts to reach your goals.

In my case I focus on 2 things : my blog and building strength

-Steph

P.S. Do you want a free training program ? Click here